Didn't See It Cumming...

So, my house is on the market-yep, part of divorce hell...having to pack up, move out...blah blah blah...needless to say there have been many people coming and going over the last 3 months to see if mi casa es su casa.

I consider myself to be a sharp, astute, progressive, independent woman of the new millenium who knows how to take care of business, things, myself and of course my "needs" - at least 3x/day on a daily basis. I did say I have "needs" I guess I have more than others- especially when I'm sick, I get extra "needy".

So, I come down with a sinus infection - since I'm sick I'm extra "needy" and all foggy from being congested- definitley not on top of my game. My broker calls me on Saturday to tell me someone wants to come see the house at 4pm. I can barely get my head off the pillow but I muster up the stregnth to clean up my house, very, very slowly because I'm wiped out from all the meds from being sick.

At 4:05pm the doorbell rings. Enter Mr. Asian, his pregnant young, Asisan wife, his Asian wife's Asian mother accompanied by the Asian broker. They are all wandering aimlessly through my house.

I have not yet conquered my bedroom and explain that I've been sick and apologize for not making my bed. They all enter my bedroom and I'm still apologizing because of course I want everything looking pristine. I spend a few minutes talking to the Asian husband and hisAsian pregnant wife, escort all the Asians to the door, thank them for coming, lock up and run upstairs to take a nap.

I get up to my room, plop in my bed and G A S P! On top of my sheets lay my 8" hot pink G Spot finder and mini blue marblized vibrators! How did I not see this? I felt like Lucy because afterall, something like this can only happen on TV, right? Wahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

I call my girlfriend, hysterical with tears rolling down my face, trying to get the words out and tell her what just went down and she said, "maybe they didn't know what it was?" I said, "girlfriend, they're the ones who manufacture this stuff!" She said, " well no matter how much they love your house, they're not buying it now!"